As humans, we tend to get obsessed with our work and often choices. We get so engrossed in our way of living that we don’t tend to show empathy to other people’s choices. In the worst-case scenario, we begin to think it’s either my way or the highway. Life experience is our greatest teacher for personal development by far – and if we are open to it and are taking notice.
The most basic life lessons are:-
- What actions and choices have consequences. Acknowledging that everything we do has “a cause and effect” – and will come back to either bite or reward, make us/others happy or sad = lesson learned.
- Mistakes help us to grow; – if we take the lesson from them and do not consistently repeat through lack of care.
- The need for self-discipline and self-restraint. As we learn that what we put into a life we will get out of it – making us stronger. And when we “lose control” of ourselves regrets and pain will result.
- That the best in life does not come knocking on our door. We learn we have to chase after it, becoming proactive towards our goals and dreams to realize them. “We have to go out and make it happen through not giving up”.
- It is fruitless to worry about what others think of us. We learn we cannot please everyone and it is what we think about ourselves, who we are, what we do and believe in that matters; – as at the end of the day “we have to live with ourselves”. We create our happiness and inner peace. Others cannot offer it, just enhance happiness through sharing life with us, warding off loneliness.
- If we are not happy within ourselves – we will feel lonely in a crowd.
- The need for independence. Owning our struggles and finding solutions rather than consistent worry – wards off depression/anxiety and enhances well-being and resilience. Self-reliance will never let you down then. Others may.
- The realization/awareness of the need to be needed that offers purpose and what motivates us to get up out of bed. Life teaches us this to all – the need to love and be loved from day one – even if it is only by a pet. To be appreciated for what we do and “who we are”, for someone to care and to care for someone, is what will keep us going…
- The goal of “eternal youth” and beauty will not earn you genuine respect, self-value, or real love. What you do that offers value and enhances the well-being of others will.
- Looks “are not important” – but is only marketing propaganda society brainwashes to make one feel inadequate to sell beauty products, magazines, medical procedures, fashion, makeup, and so forth for profit – to feel “lovable”. And the superficiality Hollywood portrays that we have bought into – is not reality. Who we are and the good we do enhances self-worth/esteem and genuine respect and love from others – is of real importance and the goal to true happiness. As in the end, it is the legacy we leave, the hearts we touch, and the love we take with us is all that remains and what matters. Everything else is fleeting and fades away.
- The need to live “one day at a time only”. Realizing that living in the past or worrying about the future creates anxiety that overwhelms – weakening resolve and productive action of dealing with “the now”; robbing us of the joy of the present. Dealing with the present as it arises doing our best is all that is required to move forward and enjoy life.
- As we age we learn that everything passes and life is short. Learning to make the most of the time offered – as tomorrow is not promised to anyone.
- That wisdom is “the opening of one’s eyes” through learning life’s lessons well in knowing the difference between what is good for us/humanity and what is not. What is truth and what is lies?
- That if we look for the bad – we will find it. If we look for the good – we will find it. Life is a mixture of both – focusing on one or the other will result in a positive or negative outlook on self and life.
- That “health is wealth”
- The need to love ourselves. We soon learn that if we don’t nurture self-respect and worth – we will be used, abused, manipulated, disrespected, our needs will be pushed aside and we become treated like a doormat. We learn to stick up for ourselves and learn to say “no” at times, or voicing “our objections and/or needs”; is as important as giving and a necessity for self-preservation, self-respect, and survival.
- The recipe for success and happiness is through acknowledging self-value, belief in oneself; daring to dream, and though not giving up on our goals, on hope and love. Never give up.
- Money does not buy happiness. Money will not buy those basic needs in life that matter; – true love, self-respect, genuine friendships, longevity, family, having purpose/meaning, passions, compassion, and inner peace.
- That there are things we have no control over. Just our reactions to it and acceptance of it.
- Grief and loss. Teaches us to never take anything or anyone for granted and to be grateful for and cherish the good we have; – as we can lose it in the blink of an eye. That is was not a given right – but a blessing offered.
At last, People will judge you based on their perspective. But you need to remember the reasons behind making your life choices. There are no right or wrong answers. You need to believe in yourself and choose your happiness over everything else.